Single Mom at 18 in HUGGIES® Baby Network in Support Forums


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Single Mom at 18

From Natilee's Mom's Blog

in HUGGIES® Baby Network

by Natilee's Mom

14 Comments

	Single Mom at 18 Feb 23, 2009
Things have truely been a struggle for me since my daughter was born almost 7 months ago. Everyone has expected me to fail because of my age and lack of life experiences. Everything I do is always getting second guessed. I understand that I am young, but my little girl means the world to me and I will do anything to ensure that she stays happy and healthy. I found out after I got pregnant that her biological father is on drugs but even if he hadn't been he told everyone I was just a w***e and that my baby wasn't his. And now I have a guy who really loves us he is just too lazy to gat and keep a job, so I am still living with my father who financially supports my daughter and I but is aboslutely not supportive of me.
Posted by Natilee's Mom Feb 23, 2009 12:30 PM PST Report Abuse

14 Comments


	My son is almost 3 months old now and his father still has not seen him. In the beginning he was there and said that he would be throughout and beyond. That is what has made the situation the hardest. I live with my parents because I make just enough to pay for what needs to be paid, but not enough to be out on my own yet. Things are hard but they do get easier with time! Getting pregnant at 18 is a tough situation but no matter what age, whether you're 18 or 35 , once he's here it makes things better. There are times I sitll think about the things his dad has promised and hasn't come through and it makes me sad and upset, but then I pick up baby boy and it makes me feel so much better


	well quess what you're not alone. I'm not a single mother but I am you're age. I'm 20 now, as of today. But I had my first child when I was 19. I had a handsome little baby boy. I didn't really know anything about parenting or raising a baby. I only knew what I saw from my parents raising my little sister. I was very scared and didn't know if I could raise another life because I was still trying to grow up myself. My attitude is just like you, though. when it comes to my son I'm serious. I get down to business and do what I have to do to take care of him. I would love to be one of your friends if you're willing to except my offer. I think it would be good to learn from each other about what we know about raising a child.


	well quess what you're not alone. I'm not a single mother but I am you're age. I'm 20 now, as of today. But I had my first child when I was 19. I had a handsome little baby boy. I didn't really know anything about parenting or raising a baby. I only knew what I saw from my parents raising my little sister. I was very scared and didn't know if I could raise another life because I was still trying to grow up myself. My attitude is just like you, though. when it comes to my son I'm serious. I get down to business and do what I have to do to take care of him. I would love to be one of your friends if you're willing to except my offer. I think it would be good to learn from each other about what we know about raising a child.


	Im 17 and my daughter will be turning 1 on April 3 of this year. I got pregnant at 15 and had her at 16. Its hard when her dad is the only one working and he has two other kids and he has to pay child support (not saying thats bad but he supports his kids). He is a logger and construction and with the way the economy is it has hit us hard. We live in a crappy two bedroom trailer that thankfully we own. When been together for three years and none of it was easy. I stayed in high school the WHOLE time I was pregnant and the looks I got was something I could just let go. So I know how it is and its still rough right now but I know sooner or later it will get better and you should think the same way.


	Thanks to everyone who has given advise it has been very helpful!


	Hello, dont feel down and depressed about what other people has to say. Everyone always and will always have an opinion. It is what it is.....an opinion. When you are a new mother, it doesnt matter the age, you will always have people who will try to teach you things and give advice about motherhood. I had a child at 20 although I did have support I never made that my crutch. I knew what I wanted, went out and did what I had to do. A child having two parents is great but children needs stability. One or two parents can provide stablility for a child. Work with your dad, if he is willing, and go to school and get a career for yourself. It will pay off for you and your child. I'm not saying not to date or not go out and have fun, but while you are trying to get your life streight I would suggest you focus on you and your child. A man can be distraction if you are not focus. Always remember the most important thing at this time is your child! Good luck!!


	Hello, Don't feel bad when ppl look at you weird, instead be proud of your baby girl and make her proud of you! Go to school and get a career, U are not the first or last single moma! You can do it there is all kinds of help out there you just need to find them! There will be obstacles but nothing you can't handle! I'm a mommy of 2 an infant and a toddler, I'm in the military active duty which means I'm on call 24/7 on top of 9hrs shifts 5 days a week, I take 2 online courses and to top it all off I have a husband that is not much help most of the time! I promise you every thing is possible! And about that boy you don't need any set backs! So make up your mind and press on, don't stop till you secure your child's future!


	this is what i say, take charge of your life. tell you dad you will make a deal with him, if he babysits you will get a job and pay him back with some of the money. now i know leaving you baby will be hard but and least she is with someone you know and trust. see you take charge and going out and getting a job to help support you baby will help your dad alot. he will learn to trust you and your choices much easier if you get a job and eventualy get a place of your own. and trust me you will love the independce of being on your own, no one can tell you your doing something wrong. i got pregnant at 19 and i wasnt married i know how hard it is. fortunetly for me the babies daddy loved me and married me. but we had to live with his parents for a while and i know how hard it is to listen to them say your doing everything wrong and that they dont believe you can do this. but you can and you will.


	Hi. One thing that I have realized since I've gotten pregnant is that it doesn't matter how old you are when you have a baby because financially no one is ever going to be ready. I am 22 years old and laid off from my job. My finace and I are doing the best we can financially and know that once this baby is here things are going to be tight. Just remember to keep your head held high and that there will ups and downs on the road to raising your daughter, but you can do anything you set your mind too. And don't worry about people second guessing you. My fiance's family is already second guessing me because I want to get a job again and return to school full time after I have the baby. They think that I'm going to put my baby last but like I told them, just because I am having a kid doesn't mean that my life is over. I can still live out the dreams I have and raise a child too.


	hi i just had a baby girl cecelia rose on feb 14 im 18 years old also she is my life i love her so much me an my husband got married on halloween we r livin with my parents who are gonna b movin soon an when they do idk where were gonna go or what were gonna do he is the only one that has a job an doesnt make much from it usually only a little over 100 if its a bad week only like 80 an on a really good week maybe 150 .but that isnt alot an goes fast cause we have to pay phone bill /a few other things ,diapers ,food ,etc its really hard taking care of a baby at a young age there are alot of challenges an changes like not much sleep you dont get to eat or go out anywhere an whenever u want etc . but seeing that lil babys face an holdin them it all is worth it .


	I know exactly how you feel, I had my daughter who is now 14 months when I was 18. I am now 19, but people still make the same judgmental opinions of me. They think because I am young I can't raise her. But, as long as you keep your head up and you ignore what everyone else is saying it doesn't get to you. I know it doesn't bother me anymore because I know my daughter is happy and healthy.


	I am a single first time mom at 31. I waited until I was older and my boyfriend and I who had been together for 3 years at that time planned to get pregnant. I thought it was a little backwards, not being married but I thought we loved each other enough and would eventually walk down the aisle. Surprise, he started going out with friends got a motorcycle and I recently found out he was cheating on me while I was pregnant. Bottom line, love him and be with him, but pay attention to signs, you'll know, if you're honest with yourself you'll do what's right for you and your baby, not him. Be strong, things always get better, your father may not show it but the simple fact that he's helping you says it all. Education will make you independent!!!


	You should really tell Mr. Not Getting a Job that if he truly loves you and your baby he would be doing more to try to support you. I'm not telling to second-guess his love, I'm sure he does love you, I'm just saying that its a good way to give him incentive to get a job and show his love at the same time.


	I do know how you feel when I got pregnant with my first I was 18 just out of high school and made the choice to do it on my own. My daughter will be eleven in June and I just found out I am pregnant again. I am married this time which will make it easier I hope. Your dad my not seem very supportive but if he is supporting you financially then he is more suportive than some. All I can tell you us to be patient as it is a hard situation for him as it is for you. He is trying to deall with his own issues with u doing this on your own. I can tell you it never gets easier but it is not always so hard.

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